Was chatting with someone in the cab one night.

We were on a topic about a common friend & he casually asked me something personal abt that friend. I wasn't ready to divulge his secret to someone else, afterall it's HIS secret. But at the same time, i know my friend isn't that nosy type of gossiper who is free enuff to go ard spreading other pple's stuffs.

I was at a loss of how to respond, so i shot him an embarassed smile and looked away.

Then his respond came, which gave me quite a huge nudge in the head.

"It's irritating that u gave me this kind of look.. It's obvious you know something but you pretend you don't know. You can just tell me directly it's not good to talk about other people's personal stuffs mah." [*note: loose translation]

At that instant i felt like someone swinging a baseball bat into the corners of my head. (i'm NOT blaming him, cos i know he's 'teaching' me!)

Why didn't i just say the truth... that i'm not ready to share a secret?

I felt really dum dum and in the end, he has to teach me how to react to situation like this. I can almost feel the cabby uncle laughing at us when i repeat after what he said.

But well, it's really quite a sad truth la.

At the age of 25, i'm still unexpressive of my thoughts and i don't really quite know how to respond/react/choose the right words for various situations.

Sometimes i'm just insensitive to my surroundings.

Most of the time, i'm just totally clueless how to say the right words to avoid hurting others/embarassing situations/certain sensitive questions.

Alot of beautiful words and pictures might be endlessly floating thru my head, but i'm just unable turn them into words as i open my mouth to speak.

*ahhhh*

Yet, if given a piece of paper & a pen, i can probably express myself much much better. And that's probably why i like guys who don't really speak TOOO much. I guess i've a phobia trying to respond to all his questions and words.

People like me shld be sent back to the good old days where cavemen & cavewomen communicate via 'WOO-WOO-AH!' 'AH GOO AH GOO GAH!' or crazy exaggerating handsigns.


Like this:

Aniway, thanks to that friend who taught me how to 'reject' people in a polite way!

GREEN HOUSE ROX MY SOCKS! ^^ [it's ok if you don't understand. I've alr warned you, i speak stuffs that's totally out of point haha]

+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+

Friend asks me if i can help her ask someone if he's interested in her.

Totally unpredictable. I thought she likes someone else & vice versa.

Firstly, i don't really know her THAT well.

Secondly, these stuffs are HARD to help. Esp if i'm totally uninvolved & don't wish to get involved.

Thirdly, i believe what's yours will be yours. Maybe she should spend time knowing that person better? Character compatibility... Communication... These are REALLY important foundation laid before u fall straight into a r/s. Afterall, how much does she understand him? How much have they communicated so far? How long have they known each other? 4 months? Or lesser?

Fourthly, she's still young, eligible and tons of guys are eyeing her with drooping eyes. The guy is young too! Their futures are soooo unpredictable...

Lastly, i doubt i will chup into this complicated business.

Somehow,i think guy & girl... They seem to be worlds apart too...

BUT well, who knows? Anytg can happen! But poor thing to the *other* guy who might be thinking he has got a chance with her... Wah Biang~ he's just used as a "bait" to test the *main lead's* reaction lor. I don't really like this method to 'test' a person's feelings btw....

Sighs... Complicated triangle lah.

+*+*+*+*+*+

On a happier note, i'm pretty broke and my performance bonus came at the right time!! Time to scrimp and save for my upcoming trips....*grins*

And my hp is NO longer lagging! Thanks to honglee's suggestion to update my hp software via internet... Now sending smses are no longer a sad 3 minutes wait!

I'm gg to fork out a sum of money to change my house sofa, a new wardrobe for mama dearie and a new working desk for myself! Being able to do something for my family makes me happie..... WoOohOoO......

And and....

The meet up with you was great! It has been a long time since i've walked from orchard to suntec.... but it's really good to know we can clique! And walking in the night super rocks.....

HeLo new friend! =)

I'm opening up myself to more possibilities, but this doesn't mean i'll be a fa hua chi & falling easily for any Tom, Dick or Harry that comes along....

It's just that people move on. I move on.


And i'm all ready to accept a brand new life that seems totally not 'EXCITING' with all those emotional rollercoaster rides.. But alot more stable & peaceful!

WoOhOO!